Diva or B****
Today many women are referring to themselves as being Divas while others are regarding themselves as B****** i.e. Trina “ I’m the Baddest Bitch” or Lil Kim “ Queen B”. Ladies, which persona do you most easily relate to and why? Gentlemen given the choice would you prefer to date/have a serious relationship with a Diva or a B**** and why?
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Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Michael Morris on -
That's what I'm talking about!
Much respect...
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Permalink Reply by Cheryl Jones on -
LaKeya, first off let me say that as I read your portayal of Divaism...I Iaughed, because up until about 5 years ago, I would have totally agreed with you on the definition!! I guess I too am a Diva, but now, in a different sense of the word. I remember the days of matching bra & panties, not a hair out of place (and I didn't have to wait on anybody else to whip my coif into shape....I did it myself), not a nail chip, never a day in sneakers (too tomboyish. I even played right field on the baseball diamond at Dougherty in 3 inch stilletos because Coach Fields wouldn't take my excuse that I didn't own a pair of sneakers), pantyhose everyday, even 102* in August....Hell I was even so bad that on my daily caffeine run, my coffee cup matched my outfit! I think it may have started when I recieved my first mink coat at the age of four. I mean where could I go but up!!! So yes, the majority of my life was spent carefully examining the mirror to make sure that I was 'presentable'. Never though did I have the attitude that if I didn't garner a smile, one wasn't due. I kept a smile on my face... simply because I knew I looked good! Fast forward to now....My status as a Diva has not changed, but my outward appearance of one has....Yes, I do step outside with my doggy slippers on. Why? Because I am comfortable and secure. Yes, I do go outside with a doorag on, because my divatude has taught me how to accessorize it as part of my fly wardrobe. Every now and then, I have a chipped nail or two, but I can easily forgive it because it reminds me that I have had a full day of living, and for that I am greatful.
Now don't think that I am trying to come down on you or discredit your beliefs, but I am just saying that when you make it to where I am now....some 12-13 years of continuous spirited living.... you will see that Diva 2'D is a state of self confidence, no matter what anybody else thinks!!!
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Permalink Reply by ｡◕‿◕｡❤LaKeya❤ ｡◕‿◕｡ on -
Cheryl, I totally understand where you're coming from. About the smiling issue, it's not something I think about when I'm in public. It's not a gesture of saying I'm better than everyone else or that I don't give a damn it's just a part of who I am. The reason I say this is because I know who gave me everything I have physically and material. I also know he can take it away if I didn't show humility. About my Diva list, i.e.: chipped nails and bedroom slippers, I don't do that for others either. The things I do are solely for myself. I enjoy knowing I have it together inside and out. Another reason I do what I do is because I was raised by a "Diva". I was taught things like always have clothes on before 12pm and never go in public with rollers or a comb in your hair. I'm 29 and I have 29 years of this behavior and probably will die with it. I can say I do appreciate someone's gracious input without them being condescending, so thank you. I didn't want my post to be misunderstood as being arrogant or conceited. Because I love my outer appearance doesn't mean my inner spirit is broken (this is for anyone else that may think my inner being is lacking). It's possible you can have both in check. I'm not perfect, however I do worship the one person that is perfect and the one that created him. They know who I am internally and externally and that's all that matters.
:-) :-)
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Permalink Reply by Cheryl Jones on
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My dear Sister, I would never tear a sister down!!!! That's a part of what's wrong with our "sista'hood" today...we look too hard for that we can criticize far too more than for that which we can emphasize!!! I love the fact that you are so confident...as I said, I was once there! I get your point about the smiling, because I must admit that there ARE days that I just don't feel like it!!! And there are times when I greet with a smile only to meet rolling of the eyes or the swift but seemingly just, hater glance, you know the one where they won't hold eye contact long enough to smile, but if asked, they can tell a passerby exactly what you have on, how tall you are, how much you weigh and when you had your last perm touch-up!!!LOL!!!!! So please continue to grow and take in all that you can from this learned thing called "life".
Peace to You!!!!
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Permalink Reply by Marc Styles on -
Okay Tony, she let's you know what she thinks a diva is.
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Permalink Reply by Cheryl Brown on -
"DIVA" is the female version of a "HUSTLER."
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Permalink Reply by T0ny M0$ley on -
Marc, B can be whatever she likes in my book;Diva, Hustler, B****, Lady or etc...I'm just enjoyng the discussion thats happening on this forum right now because it's giving me a greater understanding and appreciation for the Diva persona. There are several self proclaim Divas on this site and I wanted to know what separated them form the rest of the ladies. Thanks to the last few post that picture is becoming much clearer for me. Please keep it coming I'm learning at lot.
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Permalink Reply by Gwendolyn Braswell on -
Well I feel,alot of women referring to their own self as a b**** displays a bit of ignorance on their part.I feel that I am a DIVA and Ima b one til the day I die
Distinguished
Individual whose
Very
Admirable
thats the legacy I want to leave to my children ,grandchildren and people who may have just met me.The matriarchs of my family Left me a legacy of pride,confidence,and spirituality,and thats what I intend to do.
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Permalink Reply by Kanya Harrison-Reed on -
If you are a LADY you don't have to be either one....Be respectfull of yourself and others around you who cares what people think you are ..........I know that I'm a LADY..........and that's all that matters. I am a mother of a 10 year old little girl she is beautiful and intellegent why would I teach my little girl to act like/be a Diva or B......Her nickname is LADY. Be Blessed
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Permalink Reply by T0ny M0$ley on
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Cmon Marcus there are men walking around calling themselves a " good man ", hell thats their pick up line. "I'm a good man I got my own place, I got a car, I aint got no kids, I got a job and I make good money why wouldn't you want me?" Not realizing, just as you said, the women will be able to see their Swag without the advertisement and all the I's. Dude there are brothers calling themselves "goons", "thugs", "pimps" and "ballers". Why? I don't know but I would like to know. I create this forum because I wanted to know why women are using these personas to described themselves and to know what separated them from other ladies. And personally I don't perceive either persona as being negative.
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Permalink Reply by Kanya Harrison-Reed on
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I think that we have these categories because that's what they know and grew up around so that's what they become but when you know better you do better. I know people that came from that enviroment but didn't conform to it because they wanted more. Why be goons, pimps, b's, ballers and such you see what kind of life those people have or had . This is why our jails are so full now of thugs, goons, pimps, ballers even Divas and B's and graves still being dug.
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Permalink Reply by Jim(my) Martin on -
Aside from the fact that I don't believe it's right to label women, or anyone, in this manner, I go for the "b****" in this sense, hands down. I tend to associate the "diva" image with rabid consumerism and blind materialism - two values I can't get behind. In other words, a "b****" is what a "diva" could be were she not so shallow. One who proudly refers to herself as a b**** - as well as one who normally gets called a b**** by angry men who are scared to death of having their privilege/"man"hood challenged - is a woman (or gay man) who is assertive, strong-minded, and self-determined. She is a quintessential GROWN WOMAN who defines her own place in society and in her relationships instead of waiting for a man, her mother, or any-damn-body else to do it for her. She commands respect because she deserves it.
Consult Heartless B****** International to find out - at least what I feel - real women are about.
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